It’s 10 pm you’re driving down the road and you spot a deer in the middle of the road. It just stands there and stares at you. Unsure as to how to move.
Welcome to my “mixed” state. I don’t have full depression or anxiety. I have both. I want to move but I can’t.
It passes but in the meantime I’m stuck. I’m scared if I pick up the phone and call someone they will yell at me. I am scared if I go out the front door, something I don’t know what but something will happen.
It can take hours if not days to talk myself into a shower. I don’t know why exactly, perhaps the boogieman is in there. Deciding what to eat/wear/do are nearly impossible tasks.
I am worthless and scared all at the same time. Many people take this as me being passive aggressive. It’s not the case, I just can’t come to a decision in my head. This is a strange concept for most people. Depressed people, don’t care. Anxious people are quick with a decision. I am neither, stuck like a deer in the head lights.
And that my dear friends is what it can be like some days. Not today but some days.